Bresson will become my second Resnais

Au hasard Balthazar

I have fought myself for years until I finally watched the film today. I can’t even remember anything comparable except maybe for “Inland Empire”. But what am I supposed to say, I am actually very scared of the sadness lying upon this film. It’s for the same reason why I would never watch “Lilja 4-ever” or “Breaking the Waves”: I don’t think my weak mind can handle it. What is so great about films that are all about suffering?

Now “Au hasard Balthazar” is not entirely like those. The first time I tried to watch the film, the incredible sadness of the film completley hit me; the second time, I still cannot decide what I prefer, but ultimately there is a certain disgust that goes with it. In some ways, Marie absolutely makes no sense, in other ways, she behaves like a typical female cliché: Someone abuses her and she thinks she loves him; she offers herself to some old, ugly man and the very moment she does, she starts insulting him. And in the end, she denies a possible relationship to her only love and the only worthwhile man in the whole story. Of course!

There is a part of me that really likes how the film is made. The whole imagery of Balthazar is absolutely wonderful… and then there is a side of myself that has feelings and which is immediately angered upon the view of the happenings in the film. I also don’t like movies about “the good” and “the bad” in which people who are good are amazingly good (Jacques) and the ones who are bad are evil beyond comprehension (Gérard).

By the way, there is something very, very disturbing about talking German, writing a blogpost in English and watching a French film at the same time. What happens then is that I start writing “dans un…” in the blogpost, and I only discovered my mistake when I had difficulties continuing that sentence.

In the end, I definitely do not like this film as much as literally everybody else, although I see its aesthetic appeal and the greatness of the mise en scène of the film. The beauty of the Balthazar storyline makes up for everything, and the end alone is worth to see this unusual film.